"My Thoughts"
Chandler Welch
IS THIS LOVE?
When our feelings are more about not being alone or when it's hard to feel okay about ourselves - and we seek out someone else to fix that - that's not love.
We can end up with the illusion of love - maybe even a strong connection in the beginning, but it almost never lasts - it can't. So the question is:
"Do I love you because I need you"?
Or
"Do I need you because I love you"?
The kind of love that is based on genuine give and take builds a far stronger bond because it creates a feeling of genuine connection and trust.
But when the emotional needs and expectations of one person dominate, then it's an unhealthy one-sided relationship based on emotional need rather than genuine caring and love.
ANXIETY
-
The key to dealing with anxiety is to understand that your mind is working to protect you from what's driving the anxiety to begin with.
-
So our mind tries to keep pushing the original reasons for the anxiety off into the corner - so we don't keep feeling those feelings.
-
And we repeatedly or obsessively focus on almost anything else or anyone else - we still feel the anxiety but we're not so focused on those original thoughts or feelings.
-
The Solution: to identify, understand and emotionally process what is driving those thoughts and feelings behind the anxiety. It's a process that works.
THE KEY
TO CONFIDENCE & STRENGTH
-
Separating yourself from the negative emotional messages from the past that has created negative, self-critical feelings about yourself - is key.
-
Because most uncertainty about ourselves is driven by the anticipation of criticism or rejection - from the past.
-
A realistic perspective on yourself - and having a reason to get out of bed in the morning helps us focus on what really matters and what's best for ourselves.
-
Why is that important? Because the criticisms and negative energy from the past has never been based on the reality of who you are.